LA Women

Dear Los Angeles,

I’ve lived in Brookyn for two years now and about twice a year I get back to LA to visit my family. This year I’m able to be in LA for an extended amount of time and it’s been really interesting to notice more than ever the very distinct features of LA women that I’d never noticed before.

Here are the top 5 things that amaze me about LA women:

1. The average LA women is Size 0 and Plastic. I went to an amazing Kickboxing Class a couple nights ago at M6 Fitness with a very close friend of mine. Both of us are about a size 3 and everything on our body is real. Her body has delivered children, mine hasn’t but we both have very real but very fit bodies.  I can’t even think of the last time I had a complex about my body image until I walked into this Studio and looked around at the other women that would be joining us for the class. It was a room full of Mattel images!

2. LA women always smile. They can see a perfect stranger and their face lights up as they pass them and either give a perky little “hello!” or a small nod of recognition. My mother and I went to the bank yesterday morning and as we were walking out this lady was driving around the parking lot looking for a spot. As soon as she caught our eye her face broke up into the brightest smile and she gave a small wave in our direction. After first looking behind us to see if she had spotted someone she knew I turned to my own mother “Do you know her?” My mother shrugged and shook her head. That’s just how they do in these parts.

3. Everyone is an actress or in the music industry. I remember having a conversation a few years ago with a friend of mine, Kel Spencer, about how LA is made up of people trying to make it into an industry and New York consists of people who have broken into the industry. At the time I remember thinking that’s just a Hollywood perception of LA but most people have little to no interest in the industry at all. Then, yesterday I was at a Seminar in Los Angeles and I sat next to three different people throughout the day. The first a film producer, the second a musician and the third an actress. Soooo…maybe there’s a little more reality to that perception than I realized.

4. LA women will pretend to like you! It’s really amazing and when I think back at this I realize I also used to be quite good at this, although I’m a sucker for liking just about anyone. So I’ve learned this is what this looks like: As long as she’s single and doesn’t have any prospects for a date she’ll surround herself by girlfriends that fit her needs and her purpose. She’ll cry on their shoulder, she’ll follow all their advice, she’ll bask in their friendship as long as necessary. When she gets a boyfriend and he finally asks her to marry him she’ll make the phone call to gush about the engagement and gloat about the size of the ring. Then after that, you can forget about it because you’ve been replaced by the boyfriend’s friend’s wives and girlfriends as they now fit the current need. The day of the Big Country Club wedding at Lake Sherwood you’ll be sitting at home alone wondering how you could have missed that this LA woman faked her friendship for the last five years!

5. Every LA woman is on a diet of some type. Either she doesn’t eat carbs, she only eats carbs, she only eats carbs on the weekend or she’s on a gluten-free diet. She’s doing the Master Cleanse, she’s on a liquid diet, she’s on the South Beach diet, she’s on the fruit and soup diet. Whatever the diet,it absorbs her and it is the beginning and end of every conversation and gets worked into every single encounter you’ll have with her. She shrivels her nose up at the sight of bagels and pizza and coffee with sugar and cream. She hasn’t had any milk other than soy since she became a size zero and had her nose and boobs done. Which of course is how the Barbie syndrome begins in the first place.

Naturally, this is not all LA women but it is hilarious to me how cities all have their own stereotypes of the people who live there. I’ll do a post about Brooklyn women very soon and you’ll be amazed at how many similarities lie amongst us as well. It’s the nature of Human Beings and I just find it so interesting!

Love Always,

Sunny

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Comments
One Response to “LA Women”
  1. laikalana78 says:

    Great post Sunny! We will have to work on a TX post too LOL! Can’t wait to see you @ the end of the month

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