Lockup is one of the most addictive shows I’ve watched in quite awhile. I have been amazed, appalled, shocked and awed at many of the stories that I’ve heard on there. It has become my Friday and Saturday night addiction. While it’s a world that is very removed and the majority of the stories turn my stomach to the point that I have to momentarily turn away there is also a personal connection that I truly wish didn’t exist.

Four years ago this August I turned on the television to see the face of one of my childhood best friends staring back at me in the face of a mugshot.  As I sat stunned and staring at the screen every phone in my house began to ring. Within minutes my current best friend was at the door knocking on my door.  I still sat in utter shock as the news story unfolded in front of me.

Finally, I answered the phone and walked to let my friend in the front door.

“Sunny turn on the television.” My mother sputtered through the phone. In such shock herself she was having difficulty getting the news out quickly enough. “Turn on the television, Calvin killed someone.”

My first thought was that it must have been a bar fight gone bad or maybe he’d been involved in a drive-by shooting and accidentally shot an innocent bystander. Surely this was an accidental killing of some sort. A mistake. It had to be a mistake.

I watched the news story unfold and quickly learned it wasn’t a mistake. The gentle, sincere 14-year old who had grown up down the street from me, whose house I’d spent almost as much time at as I spent at my own had grown into a monster. The worst kind of monster, once I could absolutely not fathom and became overwhelmed with grief at what this man had done to a child, done to a family.

Calvin Sharp was no longer the man I knew and the man I’d grown up with. I have followed his story and with the information provided by MSNBC’s Lockup now also know that not only is he the lowest considered form of human on the face of the Earth in free society he is considered equally as viral and disgusting in the prison system. A prison system in which he is likely to be locked in solitary confinement for the rest of his natural life. He has now been found insane by three different prison-appointed psychiatrists so there is a possibility he will be moved to a psychiatric facility in Los Angeles in which they deal predominately with insane criminals.

Every time I watch MSNBC’s Lockup I learn something new but every time I watch I also realized that as I look with disgust into the faces of these many men and women who have committed heinous crimes it’s a little too close to home as I am unable to escape the reality that locked up somewhere in the confines of one of these prison systems who committed a crime I never could have expected him to in a way I never could have expected him to.

Love Always,



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